Till Death Do Us Apart

It was announced last week to the parents that the MOU has ended and we're now in the transition of moving back to HQ. It has been a ripe fruitful partnership of 8 years and now its time to move into something else. I am looking forward to the new change; i caught a glimpse of it and it will be exciting. =D

At the same time, i will definitely miss the children whom i have grown to know and love personally.

It is coming to three years now. I wanna praise God that I am still where I am for it is by His grace that carried me through. I won't say it has been a long or short years, through it all, it has been a good fight. =D I am more aware of the needs and I can see greater things to accomplish and being the catalyst of change. It is not going to be easy, it has never been. I AM looking forward to the new challenges in stored. =)

Last week one of the parent asked what do i feel with the end of the partnership. Her daughter had been with us for about 8 months? She's a tough cookie to teach. Not an easy one at first, I had to win her over to my side and show her it is fun to learn. Many of times she would sweep the whole teaching materials off the table onto the floor, getting up the chair, climbing over her mom to make for the escape. Or she would get all squirmy and jelly like to slide down the chair, in attempt to escape the lesson. She even left me a mark on my hand, a scar. I don't know what to say..... a chance for me to practice unconditional love? Grace? -_-”

It was quite funny when she bit me, i had a shock of my life but i think she had a bigger shock when my reflex was to grab her neck. It was kinda funny when she burst out crying when i am the one who was feeling the throbbing pain with bits of my skin bitten off! Lol, it was funny, when i pointed it out and said to her, “See! OUCH!!! Teacher here pain!! OUCH!! No biting!! PAIN!! NO BITING!!!”

Anyways, praise God, i truly praise God that my reaction wasn't overblown. I think that time onward, I had won something.

Back to the mother, she had expressed that she will definitely miss us when we are gone. I can't tell you how much it touches my heart knowing that. A few days later, the her dad asked the same question and expressed the feeling of his daughter not being able to see us anymore. I am in awe of how we have made an impact and really making a real difference in these life. I am in awe......

I don't believe I will ever lose touch with these children. I mean, they have become a part of my life and we have been doing life together. With the little ones, with their parents. We have build relationships. We have been there for one another, praying for their individual life, being the support, lending a ear, be the encouragement, be the hope.

Being involved in this community, i don't think there is no such thing of “end”. I mean we're like a family, we are connected to one another, we are a network of support, we need one another. We never end. Only death will do us apart.

I want to look forward to see these children all grown up, living life meaningfully. Being an active participant and active contributor in society. I want to see them making it, to live meaningfully, every single one of them. Every single child that God has uniquely made.

I can't see how I will ever part with them. Only death........ or maybe distance. =)

A Place Called Home

I was at a house dedication today. Somebody donated a piece of land and another donated the money to build the single storey bungalow. It is a nice and serene place, quiet in the kampong, with fruits trees around. Today’s sky was especially beautiful; blue with white puffy clouds, perfect place to get away from the suffocating city life.

Anyways, as we were singing praises and worship today, the experience and just being a part of it, brought tears to my eyes. Not wanting to be overly emo, but I felt it was just a beautiful sight of God’s perfect unconditional love. People of every kind coming together giving praise to our God. And that include people with intellectual disability.

I saw them clapping and lifting their hands, singing “Praise God, praise God”. Trying hard not to stare or laugh at their antics, sincerely, I think they must have brought a smile to their Father’s face. He too must have been smiling down from Heaven seeing His children enjoying themselves. I bet the boys did, seeing the way they danced and excitedly holding the mic, definitely they did enjoy themselves.

The Elder who shared the message today commended the lady who started the home. He said many of us can give money and our time, but that lady, she gave her life to the cause of caring and trully living together as a family with these adults with intellectual disability. Wow.....

In my mind, teaching and caring for these children were easy, 'coz they are so cute, adorable and funny. But these adults? -_- extra dosage of grace and love and lots of grace and love. Imagine living with them, till the day they die..... in like 40-50 years time....... whoa.......

In ending note, I am glad the community and fellow brothers and sisters in Chirst have responded to the needs and offered any help they could. It is great to see the body of Christ coming together meeting the basic tanglible need of a home.

I pray that the home will achieve its vision of living together as family, helping one another to live meaningfully and purposefully with dignity and self respect. God bless and protect them. Bless every resident and staff and volunteers and bless the home. Amen!

If I Were

If I were a butterfly, I'd be purple, pink and blue
If I were a cloud, I'd be white and puffy against the blue sky
If I were the sky, I'd be orangey, purple with tinge of pink
If I were a rainbow, I'd like to be a full circle like a halo.



If I were flowers, I'd be colourful chrysanthemums
If I were a tree, I'd want to have lots of branches and vines that children can climb
If I were the grass, I'd want to be soft and fully green
If I were a fruit, maybe coconut will do.



If I were a book, I'd want to have volumes after volumes of wholesome stories
If I were a rollercoaster, I'd want to have loops and drops and curves that makes people scream their lungs out and their heart droped
If I were a house, I'd want it cozy, inviting, warm and soft
If I were a journal, I'd let the pen write whatever it wants



If I could fly, I'd be zipping in and out of the clouds with the birds
If I could hold my breath, I'd be diving into the vast ocean with corals, fishes and dolphins
If I could teleport, I'd be at the waterfalls and next the beaches and next the mountains and next the lake
If I could go back in time, I'd be rewriting history.



If I was anything I want to be, I'd be anything I want to be
Isn't it fun to revisit imaginations
Childhood that was forgotten somewhere
Midst of changing times.

Handsome Young Man

I was awaken by a sudden kick at my foot. I looked up to see a tall handsome young man sitting right in front of me. I was a little annoyed when he did not acknowledge to say sorry. He seemed to be oblivious and settled into his seat. Annoyed i went back to sleep again....

A few stations later, people started coming in. I started noticing this man in front of me. He has very nice features, fair skin, a little rosy cheek and muscular built. He is quite good looking. =)

While looking and observing him, i started noticing some strangely familiar things about him. Somehow his movements, the way he looked at things around him, the way he moved his head, the way he listened, the way he wore his bag, the way the wore his trousers..... they were so familiar.....

They reminded me of one of my children.

Having that thought in mind, gosh, he really did have some same behaviour as the child!

The way he looked at things, the way he tries to identify where the sounds were coming from. The way the turned his head and looked around to the window. The way he sniffed the air and lacking social skills, sniffed the guy next to him. The way he holds the hand rail and again lacking social skills, his hand went way beyond to the other person's seats. The way he stands up, and started hanging both his hand on the hand rail. And he started making some grunting sound. Hehehe..... I found it amusing. It was my first time seeing a full grown adult, a man, with similar behaviour of this child.

Looking at his actions, i had a feeling that this good looking man might or prolly have some special needs. Autism maybe? And true enough, i saw him wearing a special LRT pass card for OKU. =)

In that short little experience, i noticed how the girls around him started keeping a distance from him, some moved away. Some gave a wide eye, worried, scared look. Some smiled politely, knowing something is different about this guy.

I never knew which station this guy got off. But i do wonder, what happened throughout the rest of the ride. It might have been interesting. =)

Maybe, i'll just bump into him again...... ;D

My Favourite Stories

Its been two years working with the children. I was just thinking about the lifes that i came in contact with and reflecting the wonderful changes and progress that they have made. These are the stories that i love to tell.

My children.

I love this girl. She is just so funny. Cheeky most of the time, and when she laughs, she has the most enjoyable hearty laugh which adults don't have. I remembered when i first saw her two years ago, she was on all four, at four years old. It was weird seeing her crawling to get about and very fast at it. I remember the teachers doing lots of knee bending exercises with her and it paid off! She is walking today! Last week she rote counted 1 to 6 and that was the best i have ever heard so far. She finally opened her golden mouth to count for the reward of blowing 6 candles! And she has just turned six last weekend. =)

This boy used to be a terror, he still is sometimes to the newbies. Hehehe..... i used to dread being assigned to teach him as he used to come into the centre crying till he gets out an hour later. I described him as a whirlwind of ferocious tornado storm that whirls around the centre drowning all senses till he gets out. It used to be a wrestle getting him to sit on chair to do task, it will be a great success even to get him to sit for 30 seconds without having your hair ripped off. Hehehe... i love this boy! Terror that he used to be, he still is sometimes today. But because we have grown to know him, its funny and frustrating sometimes to see him whine and cry at the certain tasks presented to him. Anyways, i'm proud to say today he is reading sentences, learning to write, can count quantities and match to numerals. Amazing for a boy who has short attention span. He has the mischevious twinkle in his eyes.

This handsome boy came in with little speech and i remember he was a bundle of energy. Everywhere he went was run, run, run. Hehehe... like a bolt of lightning. He also had a wriggly butt which couldn't sit still and has to be on the move. =P Despite his hyperactivity, he learns very fast. He can do problem solving mathematics now. And mid this year, he was the top of his class at kindy!!! How cool is that for a child with special needs?!

Its funny when i think of it. The things that we celebrate and are so happy about are the simplest littlest thing, but a great feat for our children.

We make a big deal to praise them when they could go toilet by themselve. We make a big deal to praise them when they could drink using a cup. We make a big deal to praise them when they could walk. We make a big deal to praise them when they could read, write and count. We make a big deal to praise them when they could request for play. We make a big deal to praise them when they could sit and wait. We make a big deal to praise and encourage them doing the right stuffs. It is an academy award at every small little success!

With so much time and energy invested into teaching these little ones, my prayer is to see them being accepted as part of a community.

You Are Special - Max Lucado

I stumbled upon this children story book by Max Lucado at my workplace. I love what i read. It is a simple heart warming story and little reminder to me of God's love. "Because you're mine. That's why you matter to me."

You Are Special – Max Lucado

The Wemmicks were small wooden people. Each of the wooden people was carved by a woodworker named Eli. His workshop sat on a hill overlooking their village. Every Wemmick was different. Some had big noses, others had large eyes. Some were tall and others were short. Some wore hats, others wore coats. But all were made by the same carver and all lived in the village. And all day, every day, the Wemmicks did the same thing: They gave each other stickers. Each Wemmick had a box of golden star stickers and a box of gray dot stickers. Up and down the streets all over the city, people could be seen sticking stars or dots on one another.

The pretty ones, those with smooth wood and fine paint, always got stars. But if the wood was rough or the paint chipped, the Wemmicks gave dots. The talented ones got stars too. Some could lift big sticks high above their heads or jump over tall boxes. Still others knew big words or could sing very pretty songs. Everyone gave them stars.

Some Wemmicks had stars all over them! Every time they got a star it made them feel so good that they did something else and got another star. Others, though, could do little. They got dots.

Punchinello was one of these. He tried to jump high like the others, but he always fell. And when he fell, the others would gather around and give him dots.

Sometimes when he fell, it would scar his wood, so the people would give him more dots. He would try to explain why he fell and say something silly, and the Wemmicks would give him more dots. After a while he had so many dots that he didn't want to go outside. He was afraid he would do something dumb such as forget his hat or step in the water, and then people would give him another dot. In fact, he had so many gray dots that some people would come up and give him one without reason. "He deserves lots of dots," the wooden people would agree with one another. "He's not a good wooden person."

After a while Punchinello believed them. "I'm not a good Wemmick," he would say. The few times he went outside, he hung around other Wemmicks who had a lot of dots. He felt better around them.

One day he met a Wemmick who was unlike any he'd ever met. She had no dots or stars. She was just wooden. Her name was Lucia. It wasn't that people didn't try to give her stickers; it's just that the stickers didn't stick. Some admired Lucia for having no dots, so they would run up and give her a star. But it would fall off. Some would look down on her for having no stars, so they would give her a dot. But it wouldn't stay either. 'That's the way I want to be,'thought Punchinello. 'I don't want anyone's marks.' So he asked the stickerless Wemmick how she did it. "It's easy," Lucia replied. "every day I go see Eli."

"Eli?" "Yes, Eli. The woodcarver. I sit in the workshop with him." "Why?" "Why don't you find out for yourself? Go up the hill. He's there."

And with that the Wemmick with no marks turned and skipped away. "But he won't want to see me!" Punchinello cried out. Lucia didn't hear. So Punchinello went home. He sat near a window and watched the wooden people as they scurried around giving each other stars and dots. "It's not right," he muttered to himself. And he resolved to go see Eli. He walked up the narrow path to the top of the hill and stepped into the big shop. His wooden eyes widened at the size of everything. The stool was as tall as he was. He had to stretch on his tiptoes to see the top of the workbench. A hammer was as long as his arm. Punchinello swallowed hard. "I'm not staying here!" and he turned to leave. Then he heard his name.

"Punchinello?" The voice was deep and strong. Punchinello stopped. "Punchinello! How good to see you. Come and let me have a look at you." Punchinello turned slowly and looked at the large bearded craftsman. "You know my name?" the little Wemmick asked.

"Of course I do. I made you." Eli stooped down and picked him up and set him on the bench. "Hmm," the maker spoke thoughtfully as he inspected the gray circles. "Looks like you've been given some bad marks." "I didn't mean to, Eli. I really tried hard." "Oh, you don't have to defend yourself to me, child. I don't care what the other Wemmicks think." "You don't?"

No, and you shouldn't either. Who are they to give stars or dots?
They're Wemmicks just like you. What they think doesn't matter, Punchinello. All that matters is what I think. And I think you are pretty special."
Punchinello laughed. "Me, special? Why? I can't walk fast. I can't jump. My paint is peeling. Why do I matter to you?"

Eli looked at Punchinello, put his hands on those small wooden shoulders, and spoke very slowly. "Because you're mine. That's why you matter to me."
Punchinello had never had anyone look at him like this--much less his maker. He didn't know what to say.

"Every day I've been hoping you'd come," Eli explained.
"I came because I met someone who had no marks."
"I know. She told me about you."
"Why don't the stickers stay on her?"
"Because she has decided that what I think is more important than what they think. The stickers only stick if you let them."

"What?"
"The stickers only stick if they matter to you. The more you trust my love, the less you care about the stickers."
"I'm not sure I understand."

"You will, but it will take time. You've got a lot of marks. For now, just come to see me every day and let me remind you how much I care." Eli lifted Punchinello off the bench and set him on the ground. "Remember," Eli said as the Wemmick walked out the door. "You are special because I made you. And I don't make mistakes."

Punchinello didn't stop, but in his heart he thought, "I think he really means it."
And when he did, a dot fell to the ground.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Scj3A1cLVzY

Love at work

Over the weekend, i had a chance to spend time with my colleagues just resting and being away from everyday's busyness. It was nice having the free time and just doing things that we like or enjoy doing. It was nice being taken care of and not having to worry about what's next on the agenda. It was nice having that break out of routine. It was refreshing.

In that break, i also saw a glimpse of love.

I noticed this guy. Instantly i knew he was different. His father was with him and i tried not to stare. Then i met his mother. She turns out to be the volunteer who live in the home while the caretaker have her Saturday off. From the short conversation with her, i think she's a nice lady. Giving up your weekend to volunteer taking care of a home is sure something nice somebody nice would do.

I asked how old is her son. She said 29. I did not asked much about him then. I think it would have been awkward.

In the afternoon, I saw the father guiding his son at the porch of the house. I don't know what were they doing, prolly having a walk. It was funny tho to see his arm being straight binded. =)

Anyway, night time came. While my collegues and i were busy eating and barbecuing, i saw love at work.

For that brief moment, it was a touching sight to behold. It reminds me of an unconditional love. A love that does not matter what happens or happened.

I saw the father feeding his child of 29 years........just for that brief moment..... i saw love at work.

I try to think what is it like, having to take care of the basic needs of your own child. I know of a four year old who could dressed herself. And of course, the other four year old who could eat his own biscuit. This 29 year old guy, he had to be even prompted and assisted to hold his own cup. So, can you imagine? Caring for the basic need of your child for 29 years? Feeding? Clothing? Toileting? How do they do it?

I'm guessing it is the unconditional love, a love that does not matter what happens or happened, it will always be there to love.

I saw love at work. A father's love to his child.